I can't sleep

I can't sleep · 04-05-2008

I speak it in the dark so you can see whats in my heart/ for the darkness is my state you are my light you are my fate/ I hate this place not this place per say but the lack of you in it/ so my mindset is spinning/topsy turvey between life with you and the existence without you. Relationships and yo my mind stays on it/ but I can only do so much vonage and IM before IM missing you kissing you touching you wishing you were here/ near to me in this place of a different tongue and a different climate I’m at/ my mind sets trying to stay postive but I gotta live/ and to live is to be real and acknowledge the pain my heart and brain/ argue like cats and dogs between what I wanna do what I can do and neither can see through the fog/ I am trapped in the dynamic duo of home and love sick wishing I could just pick one or the other /missing you my mother my brother./ At sunset we held hands over a meadow over a playground and it was like the sun and the moon kissed when our lips eclipsed/ your light circled my darkness until the pain became beautiful. And I lusted it I wanted it all again just to feel what I felt then/. The wind blowing chilly spring evening staring out at the horizon/ wondering where I’ve been in our hearts and minds we traveled the world holding hands. Aggreeing and disagreeing on bands sharing latte’s in cafés dreaming away our day’s end . We sit we sat we chat we listened we sang we danced oh how we danced. You were my woman and I was your man we loved each other in away that made rose’s jealous of our tulips/ A love that made flowers grow I love that everyone could see and know/ a love that lives on in stories a love that so strong that it makes things boring/ we slipped off to dinner catching up on the mind. seafood on the plate a couple of drinks late/ defenses lowered confidences surging inhabtions receeding but conversations during/ were ebbing and flowing on the beach of deep things/neither of us had thoughts Or plans of exchanging rings or so it seemed/.us being in denial made the obvious esoteric until the drums of mutual subconcious thought couldn’t bare it/ and we had to speak on what was hidden by double talked conversation./ we watched the death of the moon while listening to itunes neither of us knowing what the bearing was for this ship of relations./ we passed the time chewing r&b tunes and hip hop rhymes. Our minds melting leaving our hearts to make decisions/ we spoke so cleverly our words were so accurate time being of the essence our tongues became masters of precision./ so we continue our interactions each being the wonderful distraction just biding the time until we are no longer apart./I know life is hard, living is a passion but loving you, my queen is an art/